Your baby is not good nor bad

Photograph: Bernd Vogel/Corbis Bernd Vogel/ Bernd Vogel/Corbis
Photograph: Bernd Vogel/Corbis Bernd Vogel/ Bernd Vogel/Corbis

The concept of a baby being “good” or “bad” seems to be a prevalent one in our society. Our daughter happened to sleep through her dedication at church and several people commented on how “good” she was. I may have even said this myself. Weeks later, we were at another dedication and before the Pastor took the child from his parents, the Pastor asked if the child was going to be good or bad. That comment didn’t sit right with me and I’ve been noticing the good vs. bad dialogue around babies ever since. What makes a baby good or bad? Are they good if they don’t cry? If they don’t make much noise? I believe that a baby is neither good nor bad.They are what they are: a baby. They must cry. Make noise. Poop their diaper. They also smile. Sleep. And are quiet at times. None of these actions are “good” or “bad”. Let’s be careful with the good vs. bad talk. Let’s leave room for them to be what they are: a baby.

2 thoughts on “Your baby is not good nor bad”

  1. People ask me all the time if Emerson is a good baby. My answer: “All babies are good babies.” I answer this way because 1) I believe that all babies are good simply because they exist, and 2) I agree with you. Why judge normal baby behavior?

    1. Yes! That’s a good point. People often ask us if our baby is easy or not. We honestly don’t know how to answer that given that we have no other baby to compare her with. I like your response!

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